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# Courage to be Unpopular
- URL: https://www.smoothpebbles.org/courage-to-be-unpopular/
- Published: 2026-10-20T18:24:21.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-20T21:09:17.000Z
- Author: Richard Flanders

### A Perspective on Leadership

*Love (of the goal) gives leadership its purpose. Passion gives it energy. Trust gives it influence. Courage makes it possible.*

A timid leader may know exactly what ought to be done but hesitate because doing it might provoke resentment, criticism, or rejection. His desire for approval has become greater than his love for what is good.

We often think of pride as arrogance, the desire to dominate or be recognized. But pride can take a surprisingly opposite form: *the fear of being disliked* **.**

Great leaders have something in common. They are willing to be disliked. Great parents, teachers, coaches, and commanders understand that doing what is good for others does not always make those people happy. Sometimes love requires correction, discipline, difficult expectations, and steadfastness in the face of opposition.

*The courageous leader loves the good goal more than he fears rejection.*

### Developing Trust

The question is, "How does a leader get people to do what they don't want to do?"

There are various motivators, like fear of consequences. But a trusted leader can accomplish much. Authority can secure compliance. Trust makes cooperation possible. 

The most effective leaders don't merely issue instructions. They awaken in others a passionate desire to accomplish something worthwhile. But the leader must first possess that passion himself.

Trust grows when people repeatedly experience certain things:

- **Benevolence**: You genuinely seek their good, not merely your preferred outcome.
- **Competence**: Your judgments prove sufficiently sound to deserve confidence.
- **Integrity**: Your actions are consistent with your stated principles.
- **Humility**: You acknowledge mistakes and accept legitimate criticism.
- **Reliability**: Your commitment remains steady when circumstances become difficult.

### Motivated by Love of the Goal

A leader motivated by recognition needs followers to validate his importance. A leader motivated by love, i.e. passion for the goal and the people, wants followers to embrace the beauty and value of the mission. The distinction changes everything.

*The courage to be unpopular comes from loving what is good more than needing to be liked.*

Jesus demonstrated both uncompromising conviction and extraordinary compassion. He confronted wrongdoing without surrendering truth yet loved people even when they rejected him. Eventually they killed him, but he stayed true to his mission and love.

Hebrews 12:2 says that *for the joy set before him*, he endured the cross. He endured the suffering because the anticipated joy was greater.

Attributes to embody: To love the work and the people involved. To passionately pursue what is best despite difficulties, opposition, and personal rejection. To become trustworthy enough that others can follow even when the path is uncomfortable. And to remain humble enough to welcome correction when wrong.

Perhaps the greatest transformation in leadership occurs when we stop asking, "How can I get people to follow me?" and begin asking, "How can I help people discover something so good that they want to pursue it together?"

*Love the good more than approval.* 
*Love people more than power.* 
*Love truth more than being right.* 
*Trust God enough to leave the outcome in his hands.*